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femininity

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Head and heart, left and right. Our ability to be and our ability to do, to receive and to create. Although considered opposites, how these transpire in our thoughts and behaviours are symbols of their strength, and can shape our personalities forever. The masculine and feminine divine are not gendered, one cannot exist without the other. These emotions are not gendered, but they align flawlessly.

The universe is created by both female and male energies, they are infused into everything we know. The feminine divine is circular, it flows seamlessly and is known to be the energy that controls our emotions. Where the masculine divine is direct, a straight line that has a beginning and an ending, a direct path and is in control of our minds. For some this may seem far-fetched, but when we start to think about the brain it can put things into perspective.

We know our brain is divided. The left side is analytical and rational, it controls our ability to make responsible decisions. The right side is considered intuitive and impulsive, in charge of our emotions and creativity. Our masculine and feminine energies are divided just the same. When one side of the brain is injured, it is often left disabled and alters the person’s life severely. When the two energies that exist within us are unbalanced, it can also be threatening to one’s wellbeing.

In western culture we are not taught how to respect this divide. We are raised in a world that is afraid to stop. Time and time again we become overworked and burnt out. This comes down to how afraid we are to connect to our feminine and how exhausted our masculine energy becomes.

The divine feminine is the purest form of female expression. She allows us to build trust within our relationships and care for one another. She helps us to be patient and intuitive and infuse passion into our day to day lives.

Our past experiences shape our energies. The divine feminine is the purest form of female expression. She allows us to build trust within our relationships and care for one another. She helps us to be patient and intuitive and infuse passion into our day to day lives. When we give birth to an idea, a friendship, a business, a relationship, it is our feminine energy that nurtures it, allowing it to grow.

Traditionally, we raise our sons to be competitive and dominate. That crying is a weakness and violence is a reasonable answer. To show any type of emotion will make you a “girl” and who wants to be a weak little girl? Comments such as these are what beat down the feminine energy and cause angry boys to grow up and be angry men. When young boys are told to repress their feminine energy, their masculine energy falls into a more dominant role. This is then called “wounded masculinity”

Wounded masculinity comes from a place of fear and is an emotion that is taught to us from a young age. The wounded side comes from struggling to prove worthiness and the fear of not being loved or welcomed. Instead those emotions are replaced by ego-stroking, over-powering displays of competition and violence.

He is confident but not arrogant, adventurous but not reckless. He is someone you want to follow, he makes you feel safe, supported and protected, physically, emotionally and spiritually.

When one’s masculine energy is wounded, they will never be enough. A constant yearning to have more and more. This kind of energy is not only damaging to one’s self, but can also create division in the relationships that surround them. It is not until the masculine becomes balanced with the feminine that the true and beautiful expressions of the masculine divine start to appear in its highest form.

The strong yet gentle nature of the masculine divine is such a powerful energy that when balanced within a person, has great potential of leadership and wholeness. He is confident but not arrogant, adventurous but not reckless. He is someone you want to follow, he makes you feel safe, supported and protected, physically, emotionally and spiritually.

But men are not the only ones becoming weighed down by these external expectations. When women first started to assert their authority and truly claim their identity, the first thing we did was burn our bras and start wearing pants. Abandoning the real essence of our femininity and instead decided to compete with men and prove that we could be equally.

We are encouraged to treat sex “like a man would” not to care, to avoid “catching feelings”. Although we are no longer burning our bras, we are subconsciously proving ourselves in other ways.

We are encouraged to treat sex “like a man would” not to care, to avoid “catching feelings”. Although we are no longer burning our bras, we are subconsciously proving ourselves in other ways. We are encouraged to ignore our feminine instincts of tenderness and love and instead adopt a rigged, nonchalant, “masculine” mentality.

Ann Friedman, author of the article,When Women Pursue Sex, Even Men Don’t Get It” says it best, “Women want sex, and in particular, they want sex with people who really want them. But socially, many straight men still find it a turnoff when women are sexual aggressors. Which means that, for women, assertively pursuing the thing they want actually leads to them not getting it.”

We all have the divine masculine and feminine within our own psyche. How they come out in our thoughts and behaviours are indicative of their strengths, and often shape our personalities and relationships. It is normal human behaviour to be stronger in some aspects than others. But when you emotionally exhaust yourself and manipulate your own behaviours to fit a cookie cutter expectation of what a man and a woman should be like, is when an excruciating internal battle begins.

The idea is not to be the perfect balance at all times, to be constantly happy and logical. Of course, there are times in everyone’s lives when you need to be more flexible, either emotionally or logically, but constantly being at war with ourselves to meet societal pressures can lead to a life of emptiness and perpetual “what ifs”.